Lightening My Load

Today I’ll be leaving on a weeklong vacation to Estes Park, CO. Ian’s family visits Estes Park every summer and rents little cabins in the mountains. The weather is beautiful and the area is incredible scenic. Ian and I visited them there while we still lived at Fort Carson, right before Ian was ordered to duty in Iraq back in 2004. Last time was bittersweet; this time it’s all about relaxation and fun.

This vacation couldn’t have come at a better time. Work has really picked up as I’ve got two projects back to back that have taken up lots of my time. Once you find out you are expecting, it makes it hard to focus. And when my work doesn’t know why I’m lagging behind, or why I constantly complain because I’m tired, it makes it that much harder. Sometimes I am expected to help out and lift heavy things and at that moment I just want to breakdown and tell them, because this secrecy thing is no fun.

I had a nice lunch with my friends Mandy and Melanie yesterday, both pregnant in their own different trimesters. Mandy is due any day now; Melanie is 21 weeks- and they both look fabulous! I’ll need their secrets in the coming months. Melanie was sweet enough to think of me and buy me a book called Traveling Light by Max Lucado. I read a little bit yesterday and liked the message that it sent. It told me to “lighten my load.” Basically, I cannot control what may or may not happen with the health of this baby. I cannot continue to burden myself with constant worry; that is in God’s hands. I made a concerted decision to enjoy this pregnancy and I plan to do just that. Thank you for the book Mel! It was just what I needed.

On another note, I do feel pretty miserable today. Literally since day one of knowing I was pregnant, I cannot sleep anymore. Every night, I am somehow disturbed by Ian cuddling me to the edge of the bed, Joey sleeping between my legs, hunger, you name it…and I cannot go back to sleep. Last night I woke up at 2:45 and did not go back to sleep until around 4:45. I had to eventually move into the guest bedroom. After that, my hunger pains grew to monumental proportions; I had to eat something. I cannot win! Have any of you women who have been pregnant or are pregnant experienced this? I know its pretty common into the 2nd-3rd trimesters, mostly because of bladder issues and kicking babies, but I am only 5 weeks and this is ridiculous! I know it’s okay to take a half pill of Unisom on occasion, but the last thing I want to do is depend on something. Any suggestions?

Round Two! Pregnant Again

Hi everyone! Welcome to my new blog. Through some forceful coercion from my friend Mandy, I have decided to document this pregnancy through the eyes of the internet. Though I find my life extremely boring, there is nothing boring about a pregnancy! Anything can happen, as Ian and I know all too well after the loss of Fiona, our "first" child, to Turners Syndrome back in March. I contemplated how long I really wanted to wait after something so devestating. We thought it would be wise to wait maybe 6 months, even longer since we now had an open window to purchase a house with money we saved for the new baby. But God works in mysterious ways, and without really trying, I became pregnant 3 short months after. I guess they are right when they say it happens when you least expect it! Now I am dealing with mixed emotions. I am over the moon with happiness, yet frequently sidelined by these feelings that I may once again, get bad news. Turners Syndrome is not genetic so there is no reason to believe it will happen again, but I wish I was so easily convinced. I can only go into this pregnancy with positive and loving thoughts for this new baby who has come into my life. I am so excited to meet him/her and know that things are going to be great these next 8 months! The best part is knowing I have the support of my great friends, and amazing family and in-laws. I hope you enjoy this blog as much as I will enjoy writing it.

My first prenatal appointment will be on July 22nd. I'll be 8 weeks 5 days and will receive my first ultrasound. It will be a nervewracking event, but I'm looking forward to it more than anything. The nurses felt no reason to see me earlier because of my past, but encouraged me to call should I have any questions or need anything at all.

So far I am only 5 weeks and feeling pretty good. Fatigue is kicking in a bit, but I'm getting by for the most part. Hunger is a real issue though! How does something the size of a poppy seed make me feel like I could eat a horse?

Much more soon!
Abby (and Ian)