The Larson Family

Haley- 1 month

2009-03-20T16:41:00.000-07:00

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but I'm sure those who follow this are used to it by now. Obviously, I have a lot on my hands these days with a lovely little girl in my life! She is relatively easy to care for- only cries when she is hungry- and she is developing well! At her last pediatrician appt. she had gained 1 lb 6 ounces, now weighing in at 7 lbs 10 ounces. I was so proud! However, that was a week and a half ago and I'm sure she is around 8 lbs or more at this point. She is starting to grow out of her newborn sleepers and no longer needs the small head support in her car seat. Although these are minor things to others, they are big steps to me! Right now, I can tell she is trying to smile everyday, its a joy to watch. She is definitely finding her voice and is her happiest in the morning when she is well rested. She sleeps pretty well, as well as a 1 month baby can. She sometimes feeds every 3 hours, and every once in a while surprises me by sleeping through a feeding (those are good nights!). But regardless, its always a pleasure to see her smiling eager face at any time, day or night. She just lights up my world.

My maternity leave has been wonderful, but its soon coming to a close in a week and a half. I'm not sure that I'm prepared to go back to work, but I'm becoming a little too comfortable at home and if I stay too much longer, I might never go back! But staying at home isn't for me. I will miss her more than anything when I go back, but will appreciate the time I have with her even more.

Right now, Haley is doing wonderful holding her head up. She is not quite at full support, but I am continually amazed how well her tummy time sessions are paying off. Almost there! Recently, projectile vomiting all over mommy has been one of her favorite things; I often brace myself everytime I see a little spit up. When I go out, I not only bring a change of clothes for her, but myself as well! She is gazing at objects much more willingly than before, and sometimes even follows them when I move it back and forth. She LOVES her car seat. I'm not sure anything else puts her out more than a good car ride. Its great because no matter where we take her, she is out like a light so we can get a lot done when we actually go out. She likes to grab things. She is already grabbing my hair or shirt when I lay her down. The dogs have been great since day 1 and Haley really enjoys them. She loves to stare at Joey when he comes to lay next to her- which is often!

Here are some new photos to share of Haley. I'll be sure to update you on daily milestones and photos. Enjoy!

And Baby Makes Three!

2009-02-24T19:21:00.000-08:00

Welcome to the world, Haley June!

I feel awful that I am just now updating my blog, although most of you have probably heard by now or received an update that Haley was officially born on February 18th, after a very successful inducement. There were many times in the days leading up to that date that I felt she would come, but my body was just crying wolf unfortunately.

On the morning of the 18th, Ian, my mother, and I arrived bright and early at Boone Hospital Center. When we arrived, we were informed there were several inducements taking place that morning, but we seemed to be one of the first to arrive that morning, so I was hooked up to my IV and monitors quite fast. By 7:30 am, I was receiving my Pitocin and my doctor broke my water (a very interesting experience I'll just say). At that time, I was almost 2 cm dilated and 80% effaced. I had already been having contractions before we came to the hospital and when they hooked me up to the monitor, I could see the numbers going up (before I ever got pitocin), but they only reached 70 or so, not 130 like most contractions. However, this had been going on for over a week now and if anything, Haley was more ready to get here than not! So contractions kicked in immediately after 7:30 am and I began to progress at about 1 cm ever two hours to so. I did my best to get through the contractions on my own, but by 10:30 am, I politely asked to get my epidural. I was on a short waiting list and received some medicine through my IV to take the edge off, and boy, did that do wonders!!

After recieving my epidural, I felt GREAT. However, about half an hour in, I noticed the contractions began feeling super intense again, and I knew that couldn't be normal. It seemed I didn't get a high enough dose to start off with, so the anestheiologist gave me a higher dose and I started feeling pretty good again. I was still having some trouble with pain on my left side so they moved me onto my side to help, which it did. I actually ended up taking a nap. At that time I was 6cm dilated and it felt like things were stalling a bit. Ian and my mother started to get antsy. My nap lasted for about 2 hours. When I woke up, I noticed feeling abnormal "down there." Everytime I had a contractions, I strangly felt like I might need to push, and I nonchalantly mentioned this to Ian. Not even a minute afterward, my doctor checked on me and good thing she did! I was 10 cm dilated and at 2 station! Haley was on her way out and wasn't waiting around!! I had not even had a chance to digest this before I began throwing up. Was I really about to see my daughter?!? I couldn't even believe it. And after about 10-15 minutes of pushing(with an episiotomy throw in there, ouch), she was here in all of her glory! What a beautiful baby! All of the sleepless nights, acid reflux, and emotional breakdowns proved to be worth it after all. I would not trade that moment for anything.

Now the three of us have been home for almost two weeks and things are better that I ever could have imagined! Haley is truly a wonderful baby. She feeds regularly with no problems, and has been since day 1. Breastfeeding is better than I imagined it would be. It gives me time to stare at her all day and listen to her little coos. She is a master burper too! :) She also sleeps A LOT. What else do newborns do, right? Her mornings were mixed up with her nights for a few days, but she is getting better. She rarely cries, almost to the point that I feel spoiled. She makes it pretty easy to be a mom. She does NOT like baths, but I think that will change when her cord falls off. Crying or not, she is the most amazing little thing I've ever laid eyes on and I can't believe she is ours. I love to put my finger in her hands and feel her clench them. I love to stare at her ever changing facial expressions. I love the little noises she makes when she is hungry. And dressing her in her clothes gives me such satisfaction! She is so darn cute no matter what I put her in!

I still can't believe I have another month to do nothing but focus on her- no other vacation could ever beat this!

Here are some pictures to leave you with of Haley's first few weeks:

I will try to update the blog with more pictures and updates on Haley's growth very soon!

Wishing and Hoping

2009-02-16T07:36:00.000-08:00

Patience is a virtue. One, unfortunately, I don’t possess. If I could describe the word “torture,” this weekend would probably be a pretty good example.

I had my 38 week appointment last Thursday, not to mention my last until the inducement date. The night before I had several contractions, to the point that I was timing them to see how long they were lasting. They were about 10 minutes apart for the most part, sometimes reaching 8 minutes, but then stretching back out to 15-20 minutes again. I called Labor and Delivery at Boone, just for some piece of mind, and of course they told me I shouldn’t come in until they were closer together. Okay, I can accept that. Better luck next time, maybe. So at my doctor appointment, I found out I was now 75% effaced, which seemed to be a result of the contractions I had experienced prior. Well, at least it all wasn’t for nothing. Then Dr. Welch made the offer of “stripping my membranes” in an effort to move labor along. It doesn’t necessarily work all the time, but if your body is ready, it certainly can kick start things. So I accepted her offer with fervor and hoped something would happen. She said I had to promise if I went into labor, it would be before the weekend (she had a wedding to attend). I said I would certainly do my best!

So the next morning, I wake up and realize I lost my mucous plug. Didn’t realize it at the time, but once I did, I thought “wow, this could be it!” Once I told my mother, she was on her way down to Columbia. She had not planned to come until Tuesday night, but was convinced all signs were pointing to Haley’s entrance into this world. Cause when it happened to her, she went into labor that day. Like mother, like daughter, right?!?! If only…

Today is Monday, and I feel like a failure. I am at work, as no one would have predicted. I’ve had contractions consistently since Wednesday, and nothing as a result of it. I swear, if my body is not somewhat prepared for my inducement date after all I have been through to that point, I will scream bloody murder. I cannot even sleep in my own bed anymore. I had to sleep on a recliner because my back pains were so intense and I couldn’t figure out if it was back labor, not to mention I was still having contractions about ten minutes apart that kept me up a majority of the night before I was able to get some rest.

I know this will all be worth it come Wednesday morning, but I am holding on by a tiny little thread. Can these next few days fly by…please????????

The Countdown Begins!

2009-02-08T17:49:00.001-08:00

10 more days. I CANNOT BELIEVE IT! It was only a few days ago that I felt she would never get here. Then overnight, I suddenly realized the time left is quite short. Though at this point she can come at any time now, I have a sneaking suspicion she is pretty content in there and has no plans to arrive until we make her! My inducement is scheduled bright and early at 6 am on 18th, so I am pretty much planning everything around that day. Not to say that I still don't grow impatient. As Ian and I sit on the couch on this very lazy Sunday, I just want her to be with us so bad. So does Ian. He is starting to get impatient too! That is reassuring to know; sometimes I wonder if he is fully prepared for all to come. I think he is. :)

So for those I don't talk to as frequently, at my 36 week appointment, my doctor checked me for the first time and to my delight, she said I was already 1 cm dilated and 50% effaced. That is awesome news! But it got me so excited, I was for sure I had progressed more at my 37 week appt, right? Not so much. The baby's head had descended down but I had stayed the same otherwise. "I don't think she'll be coming this weekend" was what she had to say. Well, damn. And she was right obviously. Here I am, and still no baby. I do have contractions from time to time, but it is nothing too concerning. Everyone says I'll just "know" when the real ones get here, and only once have I had a contraction that was really painful, so I still am not quite sure what I'm in for.

People ask me if I'm scared for labor. Really, I don't know how to answer that question. To be perfectly honest, I sort of have this "anything goes" feeling to it. I am ready for whatever, and I'm not naive to know I will be in lots of pain, but I just have to go with it and depend on my husband and mother for the support I need to get through it. Can it be that simple? If not, oh well, but thats my attitude going into it. And getting the epidural is must. I have a pretty good pain threshold, but I know myself well, and doing the whole thing natural is just not in my game plan. And I'm not ashamed to admit that.

So its a countdown to the finish now. I am more excited than I've ever been. I can't wait to count her little toes, pinch her chubby cheeks, and kiss her face! Its going to be the best day of my life!!!

Baby Room is DONE!

2009-01-26T16:29:00.000-08:00

YES! FINALLY!

Here are some pictures of Haley's wonderful abode.

well, now that the room is done and out of the way, Ian and I are getting the last minute necessities together before the little one gets here. I THINK we have everything, but can you ever be fully prepared? I am sure there is something I am missing, but I've decided that those holes can be filled down the road. I'm just fixated on her getting here now! And from the way my body has been acting, that could be sooner than later. I am definitely having contractions of some way, shape, or form on a daily basis. Some are painful, some are not. Some are long, some are short. But the main thing is they aren't consistent. And I don't want her to come yet anyway! I won't be 36 weeks until Thursday. Then, I will have my 36 week checkup and a better idea of whats going on, as I'll start having weekly visits and the doctor will check my cervix for signs. I sure would like to meet Haley sooner than later, but my doctor did at least give me great news at my last visit. No matter what, I will at least have her by the 18th of February if she has not come yet. This was for no medical reasons; I think she was a little concerned for my mental state though! At my last few visits, I've had nothing to say but how depressed and sick I am of being pregnant, and she truly felt my pain. To shave 8 days of torture and wait is a HUGE relief. Although I'd prefer not to be induced, I'm not going to be choosy! This at least gives me a clear date that I can go by to close things down at work, which is so helpful.

The days and nights are harder for me, definitely, but with the help of my husband, he really does make me see the big picture. What would I do without him???

Hope you like the room! I'll post any news come Thursday. I sure hope there is something to report- I'm getting antsy!!!

Happy 6th Anniversary to US!

2009-01-12T19:22:00.001-08:00

January 4, 2009- Ian and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary! Seriously, where does the time go? Ian and I have been through many hardships that the average couple never have to experience in their lifetime, but it has never brought us down. IN fact, it only made us stronger (you know what they say). We just keep on plugging. I can truly say that life just gets better and better with him. No "itches" here!

I love you Ian and look forward to the rest of my life with you. We have much to look forward to!

34 weeks...in the homestretch

2009-01-12T15:59:00.000-08:00

Time seems to be flying by and standing still, all at the same time. On January 2nd, I went into St. Louis to visit family and attend two baby showers in Haley's honor. These types of events are tough for me. I get really flushed when I am surrounded by such generosity from others. But I made it through, and I can't tell you how grateful I am to have such wonderful friends who came to show their love and support for me and lil Haley. It's a great feeling and words can't describe it. It really puts so much in perspective.

My first shower was held by my Aunt Vanessa. It was very low key, mostly family and some friends from my moms work- only 10 people or so. I got lots of great things, including my car seat and stroller from my lovely grandma, an umbrella stroller from my cousin, and from my Aunt -one of my favorites- a Baby Einstein Aquarium that plays water sounds and classical music in the crib while the baby sleeps! Perfect!

Can you tell I like orange??

My mother also surprised me with this totally cute blanket that she made- I had no idea! I absolutely love it. It has little doggies on it too- gotta represent her "brothers." :)

But, thats just a sampling. I got lots of clothes, toys and other items to get me started! I felt so blessed. Thank you for a wonderful day Vanessa!

On Sunday, shower #2. We had 22 of my great friends and neighbors over to partake in another shower, held by my sister and Julia Gold (along with help from my mother). It was overwhelming! Everything from the food, the friends, and just the love I felt for my unborn child, made me feel pretty special. I could begin to tell you how much great stuff I got, but it would take me forever! Here are some pictures instead:

My other pregger friends, Missy and Gina:

mmmmmmmm....food....

Got my baby bouncer! Whoo Hoo!

The coolest burp cloth EVER, compliments of my mother!

Baby clothes make me cry every time, it never fails!!!

Thanks again to Julia and my sister for a truly special day! Mom, you rock too!

So, this past Saturday, Ian and I went to our 8 hour birthing class. I'm going to waste a lot of time talking about how STUPID this class was, but I completely regret taking it. I could have been catching up on sleep and rest, but instead, I was learning about stuff that I already know through my books, while my poor husband was forced to watch birthing videos of strangers' lady parts- oh, the torture! Oh well- we took a few tidbits of information away from it, but thats 8 hours of my life I'm never getting back!

My mom and dad are finally bringing down the crib this weekend. Yeah! The room will finally pull together and I can start putting some pictures on the wall. I had an issue with the curtains though- one was shorter than the other(which I'm sure you can tell in the photo), so I am waiting on a replacement. I'll post more when all is finished, but here is a sneak peek:

Also, I got the cutest frame from Ian's grandma for Christmas (I love ladybugs) and thought I'd put my favorite ultrasound photo of Haley there. After all, that was the day that changed my life forever...

I have a doctors appointment this Friday, which will be helpful to see where I might be at this point in the pregnancy. I have been having more frequent contractions that are hurting more than what I'm used to, but obviously too infrequent to be considered the "real thing." Not to say I'm going to be having this baby sooner than I think, but it sure gets me wondering. I'll be sure to give everyone an update, should I be surprised with anything!

Happy New Year, Blah Blah...

2009-01-01T07:49:00.000-08:00

Well, my promises to continue with blog posts didn't last very long, did it? Again, it took me about 3 weeks to get around to posting again. I don't really have an excuse, other than I am terrible at this blogging routine. And I am frigging exhausted, all the time. I warned myself that I wasn't a very interesting person,but... pregnancy is quite intriguing and maybe the people in my life would like to know how its going. Well, on that note lets get you up to speed:

I am 32 weeks. I am depressed. I am fat. I am forgetful. I have baby limbs coming out of me as we speak. I am in love with this girl. I am READY!

As much as I bitch and moan, I know its all for a worthy cause, but my fuse is starting to shorten. I do have good days, but the tough, stressful days where the pain of caring around a 4 lb baby are starting to take its toll. I have been pregnant for so long, I don't even know what life was like before hand. Being pregnant beforehand and having so little time in between Fiona and Haley is probably the culprit. I've been pregnant for a whole year practically!!! Which is why I was ready to let 2008 go. It was the worst year and the best year all wrapped up into one for me. Now I'm ready to move on. 2009 is the year my first child is born, and I can not WAIT to see what it all brings. I swear, sometimes I feel like I could run when I think about the fact that I will be responsible for someones life, thats its all on me and my husband to mold her and shape her and educate her. Loving her is easy, but geez...what a load to take on! Does it all just come naturally? One only knows, and I will learn in the next few months. I can only rely on my hope and faith that it will...and the 4 baby books on my nightstand that I've yet to finish.

8 more weeks. How am I going to do it?

Here are some recent pictures of my enlarging tummy:

Probably doesn't look too different from the 28 week photos, but believe me, there is! I can feel it more than see it.

On to Christmas. We headed down to Ankeny, Iowa, which is where my husband is from, to be with my in-laws. Most of them hadn't seem me since I was 5 weeks pregnant, so it was quite a shock to see me now! I had a nice long break while there, 5 days off, and it was sooooo needed. We exchanged presents on Christmas Eve, and I must say, Haley is spoiled already. I am not surprised; this is the first grandchild for Ian's parents. Ian is the oldest in his family; I am the youngest in mine. My parents only have one grandchild, and he is 16 now! So in a way, Haley is definitely "new" to my parents as well. They have to start all over again. Anyhow, Sandra, Ian's mom, got carried away at a Carter's outlet and here are some of the clothes Haley got. It is all adorable and I can't wait to see my child in them!!!

Joey wants Haley to get here too!

Haley got some fun toys and gifts from her aunts and uncles too!

Ian and I also received a fabulous video camera from his parents to take lots of videos of Haley since they don't live very close by. We were so grateful! Once I figure out how to upload the videos to the computer, I'll start getting some up here. I told Ian we had to do a "Baby Story" now (for all you TLC lovers). We'll see if that actually happens...

Probably one of the most creative Christmas gifts, and coolest, that I recieved was this frame from my great friend Christy. We had gathered the idea from a friend of ours who had one in her house, and we totally decided to steal it and do it for Haley's room. I am so glad we did, I really feel like it will be the centerpeice of the room.

The photos were taken around Columbia at different venues and businesses. It was fun trying to guess where each letter came from, but I was only able to figure out one. I need to get out more I guess! When Haley is born, the 6th frame will be filled with her newborn photo. As she gets older, the photo can be updated through the years and always stay with her. I absolutely love it. Thank you Christy!!!

In other news, the baby room is FINALLY getting underway. *sigh of relief* I recieved the dresser and drapes the other day, and we got a bookcase for her toys and books at Target. The crib should have been here by now, but unexpectedly, the crib company called 7 weeks later to tell us they no longer manufactured it! SAY WHAT??? Terrible customer service on their part. They said they could give us the Expresso crib, which is really dark wood and looks almost black (what we originally wanted). Well, after a good long cry, we took them up on the offer. But this threw off the whole black and white idea, so instead, I went with Espresso furniture, and pale lavender walls. And I'm so excited. I think when all is said and done, its going to look absolutely beautiful. Ian and I are painting today, if I can ever get him out of bed. Here are some small tidbits of the room:

Haley's college savings fund

Dresser

Drapes

I can't wait for it to all pull together!

Well, I have an eventful weekend coming up: two baby showers in St. Louis! I can't wait to see all my family and friends. It's going to be a very emotional weekend for me, I can feel it already!

I don't like making promises anymore, but I can tell you there will be a lot more to post and talk about in the coming months as the end gets near. Stay tuned!

Oh, Christmas Tree!

2008-12-09T19:14:00.000-08:00

I finally got my lazy butt to get the tree up and running this last weekend. And I think it looks quite cute, although its much brighter and prettier in person. I still don't know how to work my camera well enough to get the full effects. I should have read the manual. :(

I made sure to get Haley her own ornament. Even though she is not here in person yet, she is still very much with us this Christmas season. I can't wait to meet her, it almost hurts.

And no tree would be complete without an angel... er, uh, Quagmire from Family Guy(it was the only way I could make my husband happy without ruining the tree completely). Its all about compromise, people...

Long Overdue!

2008-12-03T17:30:00.000-08:00

To all my fellow friends who actually read this blog: I am SO SORRY! You probably thought I fell off the face of the earth. Well, almost. But I've been so busy, not to mention without internet this past week due to the transition from duplex to house. Speaking of such, I am officially moved! Hallelujah! Life couldn't be better. I am so pleased with the new place, I almost don't know what I did to deserve it. Here are a couple of upsides to being a homeowner:

~I actually take pride in cleaning. Matter of fact, I go out of my way to do it.
~I no longer have to go down to the basement just to let my dogs out. All I do is walk over by the kitchen and open the door. Beautiful!
~PAINTING. Nothing perks me up more than color, especially ones that make me feel cozy and at ease. I never have to look at a dull, light grey color for the rest of my life if I don't want!
~Cabinet space. My new kitchen is pretty amazing, and where at the duplex I had to improvise on where to put my applicances and dishes, I am actually left with empty cabinets at the house. Now I can actually go to Pier 1 and buy something for my kitchen without worrying where I'm going to store it. Actually, maybe that is a bad thing, for the pocketbook at least...

So, without further ado, here are some photos of the new place:

The proud owners!

Guest Bath

Master Bath

Master Bedroom

Living room (the Christmas tree is yet to be done!)

Kitchen

Hope you like it as much as I do. I am very pleased with how it all turned out. And god bless my husband for being the best guy in the world! He barely made me lift a finger through the whole moving process. I compromised and did most of the unpacking instead.

On to baby stuff. Well, its going. I am a big girl, I'll say that. My belly seems to be taking a life of its own these days. And the pain is catching up with me now. I was getting by pretty well, but now I'm 28 weeks and I have officially entered the third trimester. I must say, I am terrified! I guess its the fear of the unknown. I don't know much about anything, but I do know I'm ready to meet this little girl. She is so energetic, I almost can't believe how much she moves around- I'm almost tempted to ask the doctor if its abnormal! Hey it could be worse, she could not move at all. Then I'd really be freaking out. Maybe this is God's way of blessing me so I was able to finally put all of the worry behind me from the beginning. But man, I could sure use a break sometimes. She really LOVES to move nonstop when I'm at meetings at work and I need to FOCUS. She is already learning how to terrorize me! :)

Here is my belly at 28 weeks:

Tomorrow, I see my doctor for my 28 week checkup. From now on, I'll need to start seeing her on a biweekly basis. UGH. I'll be taking a glucose test to check for gestational diabetes. Hopefully all goes well. If I'm forced to prick my finger on a daily basis, you might as well shoot me now. I am not sure how much I have officially gained yet, I suppose I'll find out tomorrow. My guess is its somewhere between 18-20 pounds. Right on track! I've had to wind down walks with the dogs because apparently my pelvis can't handle it anymore. I took a half hour walk the other day and could barely stand up from my work desk the other day. Maybe my husband is right- I CAN'T do the things I used to do. But a measly 30 minute walk?? Geesh. Oh and not to mention I have to pee every freaking 10 minutes! But I never know until I stand up and the baby falls onto my bladder. Man, pregnancy is so great! When can I do this again, seriously??!!

I promise to post more often on the blog when I can- no more 5 week breaks! I just had so much going on with the house, it was nearly impossible. I should be doing the baby room very soon, so I will definitely post pictures as soon as its done.

Before I know it, this baby is going to be here. WOW.

Where Do I Begin?

2008-10-26T15:38:00.000-07:00

There has been so much going on in these past few weeks, or month I might say. Between all the newness of knowing I'm now having a girl, looking for a house, and work being work, I have barely been off my feet these days. So lots to report on!

First things first, Ian and I bought a house finally! YEAH!!!!! I never thought I would get to this point in my life; it always seemed so far away, but with a baby on the way, and fortunate circumstances in my life where I had the funds to do so, as well as it being a buyers market, we knew now was as good a time as any. I found the house while I went on a house hunting spree with my relator when Ian was away in Iowa, and came across a house on the Northeast side that I really liked, but it wasn't really on my radar until I actually got to go inside and see how great it was. It desperately needed cleaning and some small other details, but I saw the potential right away. When Ian finally got to see it with me, he agreed. We made an offer the next day and closed after a few counter offers the following morning. It feels so good to know its mine, that I own something and I can put all the love, work and passion that I want into it. Here is a photo of the front:

I love the kitchen!!

Our close date is November 21st and we can not wait to start painting! Let me know if you are interested in joining the paint party. :)

On to baby stuff. Not much new, but I am growing everyday. I am happy to say I don't suffer from headaches as frequently and I feel pretty good for the most part, but I do have some trouble sleeping. I don't wake up very often to go to the bathroom, which is nice, but I am suffering when it comes to sleeping on my side. They say the best side to sleep on is your left, but my body clearly disagrees. I wake up to the worst ear and hip pain you could possibly imagine. Honestly, my left ear aches so bad and I can't quite figure out why. You would think I was sleeping on a brick. Its so annoying. When I am having these issues in my second trimester, I get more and more scared of reaching the third trimester every day. I'm just not looking forward to what it might bring.

So far, I've gained about 14 lbs now. That worries me a little, but it doesn't really look like I've gained that much. I'm at the halfway point though, and these last months are when the weight gain really adds on, and if I gain over 25-30 lbs, I fear its going to be really hard on me. I don't eat excessively, but sometimes it doesn't seem to matter. The weight just adds on no matter what you do. I still try to walk as much as I can, but with my busy life at this time, I can hardly find the time, and exhaustion is an issue. Here is my belly as of 22 weeks, 3 days(Bouulevard decided he wanted in on the photo):

On a fun note, when I found out I was having a girl, I went out with Christy during lunch to find something fun for the baby and ended up leaving with the coolest diaper bag I've ever seen!

LOVE IT!

It came with some great extras too: a changing pad, a bottle holder, and a zipper bag.

I guess I'm not off to a good start when I go to get something for the baby and end up buying something for myself. But I figure I might as well do that now because once she comes, it's going to be all about her.

Before I go, we went to Christy's for a Halloween party last night. Can you guess who Ian and I went as?

Its a GIRL!

2008-10-14T13:49:00.000-07:00

Boy, was I WRONG!

I'm Going Through Changes...

2008-09-28T16:22:00.001-07:00

I guess I haven't really realized how my belly has gotten bigger every week, mostly because I live with it so I don't notice all the small changes.

Here are some photos of my weekly progression:

16 weeks

18 weeks

16 week

18 weeks

It's subtle, but I can see the changes! I'm getting closer to my halfway mark, and so far I've gained 9 lbs. I can live with that! But I'm starting to develop some allergies, or cold like symptoms that have made me pretty sedentary. I'll feel much better when I can feel normal again and get some energy back.

This weekend I went to St. Louis and took the plunge and invested in cloth diapers. Everyone thinks I'm crazy, but they have no idea what cloth diapers are actually like. These are not your mother's cloth diapers(cloth and pins)! They are just like disposable diapers, but much more absorbent(they have microfiber inserts), and they last you until your child is potty trained so there is no need for replacement. They cost $18 per diaper though, and you need 24 to make it work. I bought the all-in-one diapers, which you can alter from newborn to toddler with snaps. Here is a photo of the way they look, with diagram, in a color I bought:

It costs a lot up front, but down the line it is going to be an incredible savings(people spend $1000 a year on diapers), on top of being SO much better for the earth. I feel so good knowing I won't be contributing to thousands of diapers being dumped into a landfill. It is a complete personal decision, but one Ian and I felt was best for us. Just trying to do my part, you know??? :)

My 20 week scan is coming up, and I am so excited! We'll get to register in St.Louis right afterward, and that is going to be overwhelming; things will REALLY start to kick in then.

2008-09-20T16:46:00.001-07:00

I thought I would share the good news that Bank of America approved us for a home loan! Yippee! It only lasts for 90 days, so we might have to renew it but other than that, its a relief to know we have the first part taken care of. I've been looking mostly in the Columbia area now since we decided $135,000 is probably the max we can go; the homes we want in Ashland tend to be in the 140,000 and above range. We have luckily found tons of homes so far in the area that are perfect for us and are in the 129,000 range. I am very positive we will find our dream home soon!

On the baby front, I am learning he is QUITE the kicker. I think he's going to be a soccer player! He just kicked me again! This should get interesting... :)

Please forgive me!

2008-09-16T16:47:00.000-07:00

Okay, I admit it, I have been a complete slacker this past month. I didn't feel there was much to report though. The time from 13 weeks to now, 17 weeks, was really dull, and not very fun to be perfectly honest. Though I am so fortunate to have sidesteped morning sickness and most of your typical first trimester woes, I have been dealing with one symptom that I didn't expect: migraine headaches. I mean, bad. All day, every day. I worried that taking tylenol on a daily basis was going to be bad for the baby, but my doc insisted he'd be just fine. So I've been doing just that, but still feeling pretty guilty that I'm pumping my body full of medicine. I wish there were alternative methods, but so far, there hasn't been much offered my way to help. So I'm getting by, but there are days I wonder if I can take 5 more months of this intense pain. My body is starting to become immune to Tylenol, and thats not a good thing! All I want for Christmas is a freaking massage at this point.

On a much happier note, I can finally feel the baby move! I'm very lucky to feel him so early on in my pregnancy, and good thing because I was about to lose my mind in anticipation! When I'm not getting ultrasounds, my mind starts wandering with unnecessary stress. At least now that I can feel his movement, its reassuring. It actually happened when I was 15 1/2 weeks and I went to Mandy's for some girl time and Mizzou football. We made nachos and those jalapenos must have been spicy because he let me know for about 10 minutes! I knew it wasn't gas(you would think making nachos, right?)- you can't mistake those little flutters! It is really the best feeling I can describe. You tend to forget you have this tiny growing human being in your stomach and out of nowhere, he reminds you and you can't help but smile. At the risk of sounding corny, its so amazing.

My 20 week ultrasound is set for October 9th now, and the gender will be revealed. I love that there are all these little milestones you get to look forward to. Just when you think it couldn't get better, it really does! And the ultimate prize is seeing and holding our baby for the first time. It will be surreal to see the baby at 20 weeks and maybe even get a small inkling of who he looks like more already. All I know: the baby better get Ian's height!

I'll post some photos of the belly soon; its certainly getting bigger and changing everyday! And even though I barely know my body anymore, you better believe its all worth it!

Okay...This is Ridiculous

2008-08-21T17:06:00.000-07:00

I'm not so sure what has happened to me in the past few days, but ever since spilling the beans to the office, the baby must have decided that it was time to spread out and live a little. Geez, the baby is only 13 weeks- it's only the size of a peach, its not like its big enough to make ME bigger yet. But my uterus is overcompensating to give him space! I am a BALLOON! I'm just taken by surprise...and my belly is aching like hell! I guess I signed up for this, right? Just thought I would have a few more weeks before I got this big (and maybe its all in my head). Hopefully Ian finds it sexy, ha!

I'm So in LOVE!

2008-08-19T07:09:00.000-07:00

As most of you know by now, my 12 wk ultrasound appointment went much better than I could have expected. This was the NT scan that I have been anxiously waiting for to make sure I wouldn't have a repeat disaster like last time. Well, it was nothing like it whatsoever. The measured thickness on his neck was 1.5 (those numbers ring preciously in my head), which is completely NORMAL and indicates no problems. The doctor was very pleased. The sonographer also said he is developing perfectly. Thats all I wanted to hear. The heartbeat was a wonderful 158 bpm. I know I have another big milestone to pass, the 20 wk mark. I can breathe a lot easier getting past this appointment, but getting past 20 weeks, finding out the sex and knowing all is well- that will be even more sweeter. It think by then I will really start kicking up my heels and feeling good!

Meanwhile, I have some ideas for a baby room already. I'm thinking khaki walls and a classic black and white look to the room. Apparently these colors are really good for new babies, which is funny since most wouldn't really classify them as "colors." My mom introduced me to this idea when she talked about some black curtains she spotted and at first I wasn't sure, but now I am completely on board! Mother knows best, righ? I can totally envision all of it in my head, which is a good thing. I am just not one of your typical blue/pink people.

The Incredible Growing/Shrinking Bump

2008-08-12T04:44:00.000-07:00

The Day/Night belly pics, as promised:

Day:

Night:

The difference drives me crazy, because I can't tell if I am growing or if I just eat waaaay to much. But dinner is my lightest meal, so its absurd. Either way, I know for certain that I'm not going to be getting any smaller from here on out. I am seeing more of a bump in the morning, which you can sorta see in the picture. I'm getting excited to say the least!

Do I Bore You?

2008-08-10T17:44:00.000-07:00

So, its getting down to the wire. My NT scan is one week from this Monday. This week just might be the longest week I've ever had in my entire life.

I'm 11 weeks 3 days, and so far, still no belly. I do have what I like to call day/night belly. In the morning I look like your average person, but after I get home from work and I've had some dinner, I look like I could pass for 5 months pregnant. I should really take some pictures to prove this. I do feel guilty not having any fun pictures to show yet, but I promise those will come soon.

I am curious- is anyone even reading this blog? Besides the usual 2-3 people that I know of, I feel like my posts might be falling on deaf ears. Though its been fun having this outlet to vent my emotions and stress, I'm not sure I want to continue if no one reads it!

I guess a weeks time will predict whether I continue...

For those who do read, I'm glad I continue to amuse you so you keep coming back! :)

I'll Have Seconds, Please!

2008-08-03T14:52:00.000-07:00

I just turned 10 weeks last Thursday, going on 11 this week. Things are progressing well. I have somehow managed to sidestep morning sickness altogether, but the fatigue and moodiness remain, and rampantly! I did have a scare last week with a little spotting, but it turned out to be nothing. But without really knowing at that point in time, I had myself in quite a tizzy. I couldn't imagine getting this far for nothing (again), yet realize many women go through miscarriages all the time and it breaks my heart. I already lost one child myself; to lose another might be more than I could handle. I'm praying so hard that this pregnancy makes it all the way, but there is just no way to tell. If I learned anything from my past experience, its that your life can change in an instant. I am trying to enjoy this pregnancy and this little baby growing inside me everyday, but on the flip side, I find it very hard to connect when I don't know if he/she is healthy. Its such a burden, but I have to live with it. I don't have the luxury of "ignorant bliss" that other pregnant woman have.

Meanwhile, I can't stop eating. Its completely ridiculous. If I wake up at any time dring the night, I have to eat. My hunger becomes so ferocious that it hurts. And with that obviously, comes weight gain. Though I've only gained about 3 lbs at this point, it looks like 10 to me. And I think, "where the HELL am I going to put the other 25 lbs???" Seriously, I am 5'1" people!! I don't have room left in this body of mine. I am going to come down to the wire, walking into the labor room looking like a freaking oompa loompa. I don't take this lightly. I know its temporary and I will lose about 20 of those a month after birth, but that doesn't do much for me when I'm feeling like a brick house NOW. Nobody said it was easy though I guess. However, if I wasn't craving cinammon rolls and donuts on a regular basis, maybe it wouldn't be as bad. Seriously, who craves broccoli?

For now, I am still counting the days until my NT scan. You would think I wouldn't be looking forward to it, and I'm really not, but I'm ready to start loving this baby full force and looking ahead to all the great things to come.

Well, Hello There...

2008-07-22T16:59:00.000-07:00

Today was my first prenatal appointment with my new doctor, Katie Welch. I was referred to her by my friend Melanie, who is also pregnant, and I'm very lucky that I was able to hook up with her because she works with Women's Health Associates at Boone and I only hear good things about them. Shortly after meeting, she knew all about my past experience with Fiona, and all of my fears about this pregnancy. She wants me to get the NT scan at 12 weeks, which checks for chromosomal abnormalities, and if the odds look really good, there is no reason for me to get a CVS and continue the worry. That appointment is still a month away, so hopefully I can get it out of my head until that time comes. But it tends to be all consuming at times and there is nothing I can do to not worry. The good news is I got an early ultrasound today to check for multiples babies and the gestation age. Well, me and my mom's epiphany about twins was wrong; I'm only having one baby. But the age of the gestation was spot on- 8 wks, 5 days. And all looked great! Heartbeat was 175 bpm (normal) and he was developing as he should (notice how I'm saying he- I'm still convinced). All I can pray for is for the good news to continue and have a healthy baby in my arms when all is said and done.

Could I BE More Tired?

2008-07-18T10:41:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted anything in a while as I've been out of Columbia at a conference in Pittsburgh since Tuesday. Its been a long week to say the least. Someone PLEASE remind me never to agree to a conference while I'm pregnant AGAIN! This is the second conference I've attended while pregnant, and each time I was surrounded by young, talented professionals who not only work hard, but play hard. The drinking that takes place at these conferences is almost astounding, but only more so to me because I am reminded everyday that I no longer CAN! On top of that, they all went to an amusement park yesterday which has some of the best roller coasters around. DO you know how much I love roller coasters??? I had to tell my boss I "don't do rides" so I could get out of it without completely spilling the beans as to the real reason. I was not ready to divulge that information yet. I need to make it to at least 12 weeks before I let anyone outside of my social comfort zone know about me.

I turned 8 weeks on Thursday. Apparently my babies eyelids are almost over the eyes and he is starting to develop fingers and toes instead of "buds." His tail has almost turned into a butt now. :) I can't wait to see him, as my long awaited appointment is this upcoming Tuesday. I will get an ultrasound, though I'm not sure how much they can tell at this point. I will get some blood tests done though, and all that other good stuff woman go through at the first prenatal checkup. My hope is to come back within two more weeks if I'll be ordered to get the NT screening again (the test that discovered Fiona's Turners).

By the way, I am more than fairly convinced I am having a boy. I have waited and waited for the morning sickness to rear its ugly head, only to feel pretty great every morning. I can get used to this! This is completely opposite of my experience last time carrying a girl, and my mom made a point that she was sick with only me and my sister, but not my brother. Sounds about right. Headaches and fatigue though, completely different story! I was barely able to keep myself awake for my morning sessions this week, which was a miserable experience. Every second I got, I was running up to my hotel room, if only for a 20 minute nap, whatever I could do to survive another hour. I met a few other pregnant women on my trip too, which was nice to relate.

Speaking of headaches, I have one so bad right now that typing is the last thing I should be doing. I will most certainly post photos after my ultrasound on Tuesday! I could use any words of encouragement at this point, as I am still very apprehensive and scared, but so excited to see my baby!

Is it a Sign??

2008-07-06T19:59:00.000-07:00

So, I already wrote a post today but I felt quite compelled to post after speaking with my mother an hour ago. We spoke yesterday for a while so I wondered what she needed to speak about today that we hadn't covered previously. She said "Well, I had a dream last night." I immediately thought back to the dream I had last night at that moment.

I dreamt I was having twins.

Before I said anything to her about it, she went on to tell me that she dreamt I was having two babies! But in her dream, I somehow managed to get pregnant "twice." I was having one baby in 7 months, and the next two months later. She said it wasn't twins though.

In my dream, I could feel both of the babies heads in my stomach (bizarre, I know). I told my mother I was having twins, but she didn't believe me! I had to take her hand and put them on both of the babies heads to convince her.

These dreams were likely happening around the same time. I am just SHOCKED. It doesn't automatically mean I am having twins, but good lord, the thought is certainly crossing my mind now!

I need to go to bed, this is just too weird!

Home Sweet Home

2008-07-06T13:43:00.001-07:00

Ian and I arrived back from vacation yesterday and it feels great to be back home. Allowing myself the time to get away from work and spend time with Ian's family was wonderful. The mountains and the air were perfect. However, I find that being away makes me miss what I have in Columbia that much more, so what I take away from this is that my life is pretty great and I'm ready to get back into the swing of things. I can't thank my in-laws enough for the time away. We all had a great time. Some highlights:

~Ian and I stopped in Colby, Kansas to stay the night Friday before finishing our drive the next morning. I thought I would share the sign that Ian witnessed in the lobby

If you don't know whats so funny, than nevermind!

-I climbed the second most difficult mountain at Rocky Mountain National Park- 6 weeks pregnant! Honestly, I didn't really know what I was getting into at the time, but I had taken a 4 mile hike two days ago and it was pretty easy, so I thought a 9 mile hike wouldn't be so bad, right?? Well, the words "Flat Top MOUNTAIN" didn't really resonate. I realized soon after the whole 4.4 miles there were UPHILL! It took us 2 1/2 hours to get there, but I made it (I went with Andrew's girlfriend Lauren and Ryan). It was such a proud moment for me, at the risk of sounding corny. I knew in that moment if I could do that, I could do anything and I have what it takes to give this baby the best life he/she can ever imagine. Here are some photos, proof of my escapade:

My first checkpoint on the trail

On Flat Top- the scenery was amazing!

With Lauren and Ryan at Flat Top

~I took a ghost tour at one of the most notoriously haunted hotels in the US, the Stanley Hotel

The tour wasn't as scary as I had hoped, but I may have caught a small ghost(or dust) in one of my photos. You be the judge! (on the right by the door)

Either way, it was a good time and there is a lot of history to that place, so it was neat to say I had been there. We even went into the room that Stephen King stayed in where he began to write The Shining... RM 217.

That wraps up the vacay!

I found out great news for my friend Mandy- she gets induced on Wednesday! Congratulations to her! I can't even imagine whats going through her mind right now. Not only does it make the situation so much more real that I'll get to meet her little boy this week, but it made my pregnancy much more real to me as well. In the next 8 months, I will be in this same situation and I cannot wait. I am still struggling here and there with the baby's health and "what ifs" but I pray for God to just take thos worries away from me and spare me the hurt. Its not good for me or the baby.

As a side note, I turned 6 weeks on vacation and I am happy to note I experienced no pregnancy symptoms while away. They will either creep up in these next few months or I just might be one of the lucky ones. I don't want to speak too soon. I did start to feel nauseous around 7 weeks last time, so we'll see! I have a busy month ahead of me so I'll hope for the best!

Lightening My Load

2008-06-27T06:30:00.001-07:00

Today I’ll be leaving on a weeklong vacation to Estes Park, CO. Ian’s family visits Estes Park every summer and rents little cabins in the mountains. The weather is beautiful and the area is incredible scenic. Ian and I visited them there while we still lived at Fort Carson, right before Ian was ordered to duty in Iraq back in 2004. Last time was bittersweet; this time it’s all about relaxation and fun.

This vacation couldn’t have come at a better time. Work has really picked up as I’ve got two projects back to back that have taken up lots of my time. Once you find out you are expecting, it makes it hard to focus. And when my work doesn’t know why I’m lagging behind, or why I constantly complain because I’m tired, it makes it that much harder. Sometimes I am expected to help out and lift heavy things and at that moment I just want to breakdown and tell them, because this secrecy thing is no fun.

I had a nice lunch with my friends Mandy and Melanie yesterday, both pregnant in their own different trimesters. Mandy is due any day now; Melanie is 21 weeks- and they both look fabulous! I’ll need their secrets in the coming months. Melanie was sweet enough to think of me and buy me a book called Traveling Light by Max Lucado. I read a little bit yesterday and liked the message that it sent. It told me to “lighten my load.” Basically, I cannot control what may or may not happen with the health of this baby. I cannot continue to burden myself with constant worry; that is in God’s hands. I made a concerted decision to enjoy this pregnancy and I plan to do just that. Thank you for the book Mel! It was just what I needed.

On another note, I do feel pretty miserable today. Literally since day one of knowing I was pregnant, I cannot sleep anymore. Every night, I am somehow disturbed by Ian cuddling me to the edge of the bed, Joey sleeping between my legs, hunger, you name it…and I cannot go back to sleep. Last night I woke up at 2:45 and did not go back to sleep until around 4:45. I had to eventually move into the guest bedroom. After that, my hunger pains grew to monumental proportions; I had to eat something. I cannot win! Have any of you women who have been pregnant or are pregnant experienced this? I know its pretty common into the 2nd-3rd trimesters, mostly because of bladder issues and kicking babies, but I am only 5 weeks and this is ridiculous! I know it’s okay to take a half pill of Unisom on occasion, but the last thing I want to do is depend on something. Any suggestions?

Round Two! Pregnant Again

2008-06-25T09:44:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone! Welcome to my new blog. Through some forceful coercion from my friend Mandy, I have decided to document this pregnancy through the eyes of the internet. Though I find my life extremely boring, there is nothing boring about a pregnancy! Anything can happen, as Ian and I know all too well after the loss of Fiona, our "first" child, to Turners Syndrome back in March. I contemplated how long I really wanted to wait after something so devestating. We thought it would be wise to wait maybe 6 months, even longer since we now had an open window to purchase a house with money we saved for the new baby. But God works in mysterious ways, and without really trying, I became pregnant 3 short months after. I guess they are right when they say it happens when you least expect it! Now I am dealing with mixed emotions. I am over the moon with happiness, yet frequently sidelined by these feelings that I may once again, get bad news. Turners Syndrome is not genetic so there is no reason to believe it will happen again, but I wish I was so easily convinced. I can only go into this pregnancy with positive and loving thoughts for this new baby who has come into my life. I am so excited to meet him/her and know that things are going to be great these next 8 months! The best part is knowing I have the support of my great friends, and amazing family and in-laws. I hope you enjoy this blog as much as I will enjoy writing it.

My first prenatal appointment will be on July 22nd. I'll be 8 weeks 5 days and will receive my first ultrasound. It will be a nervewracking event, but I'm looking forward to it more than anything. The nurses felt no reason to see me earlier because of my past, but encouraged me to call should I have any questions or need anything at all.

So far I am only 5 weeks and feeling pretty good. Fatigue is kicking in a bit, but I'm getting by for the most part. Hunger is a real issue though! How does something the size of a poppy seed make me feel like I could eat a horse?

Much more soon!
Abby (and Ian)